Need to invent some magic glasses that allow you to see right through a hot guy’s hotness into his soul. But we already have this. It’s called a watch. That’s right, time. Time allows you to see whether or not a person’s words and actions match. That’s why I tend to look within my inner…
Dating tip 11: Boys, you all need to quit with the “throwing negs.” That’s so 2005. Quit insulting girls. Stop trying to show how funny you are by mocking us. Try it boys, try talking to a girl the way you’d talk to a hot female boss. Respectful. Don’t fight with me like I’m your…
Dating tip 10: Ask out nice guys. Quit pouting to yourself, “Nobody like me.” As my mom would say, ”That’s a lie from the devil.” Plenty of guys like you. You are busy ignoring them for hot guys who, in turn, ignore you. After all, 2012 is year of the nice guy. It is our…
Dating tip 9 — For some reason, many South Bay men don’t feel the need to wear a condom. Maybe it’s their Adonis-like DNA or their zip code that gives them this impervious notion to go at it Adam & Eve style (rawdog). While sex without a condom may be fun, it isn’t funny. Condom…
How to Get Guys to Leave You Alone: I don’t really have this problem. It’s more like resisting the urge to contact a hot guy who no longer takes my calls. Pull a hara-kiri and tell him you love him; the rest will take care of itself. Advice for avoiding creepy guys: don’t give out…
Dating Tip 8: Smile at everyone. After a week of following last week’s advice, being a snob was really boring and lonely. Just go ahead and be nice, because there’s nothing uglier than a mean girl. A special note to mean girls: maybe you were fortunate enough to be born beautiful, but it only hurts…
Does my hook-up have a degree? Dating Netiquette: What do you do when you see profiles of folks you recognize from the ‘hood? I send a little message that says hi. But then again, I am socially inept. So maybe don’t do that. It makes boys uncomfortable. They get a big head and think you…
Dating Tip 7: Avoid eye contact with the undesire-ables. It just gets their hopes up. I’m merely trying to stop getting hit on by men my dad’s age. You won’t get any numbers this way, but you can feel proud. Proud and alone.
Dating Tip 6: Be a giver. Don’t just think of what you can take from another person. Think about what you can give him/her. Fast forward to the future. “Is this someone I want on my resume?” Swap spit with people you respect. This means: No more mo-peds! (moped: fun to ride, but you wouldn’t…
“It’ll just make him like your mouth.” Quite funny, kinda sad, but very true.
sexy grammar snob 